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Noah Cyrus is finding her way out of the shadow of substance abuse.
In a new interview with Rolling Stone, the “All Falls Down” singer opens up about her struggle with Xanax addiction, sharing how she put herself on the path to recovery.
“My boyfriend at the time, when I was 18, was the first person that gave me a Xanax, and it became a way for us to bond,” Cyrus, now 22, recalls. “I think I wanted to fit in with him. I wanted to be what he wanted and what he thought was cool and what I thought everybody was doing.”
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In our new interview with Noah Cyrus, she talked about feeling “stripped [of her] own identity” when fans constantly brought up her sister Miley Cyrus.https://t.co/fe4hR5nilM pic.twitter.com/MHcwc5uPiR
— Rolling Stone (@RollingStone) July 5, 2022
At the time, Cyrus was facing all kinds of difficulties, including growing up as younger sister to Miley.
“I had a hard time with people coming up to me and saying, ‘Are you Miley Cyrus’ little sister?’ or ‘Are you Hannah Montana’s little sister?’ I did not like that, and it stripped me of my own identity for a long time,” she says.
Though she had tried other kinds of party drugs, Xanax, the brand name for the drug alprazolam, was different.
“Once I felt that it was possible to silence things out for a second and numb your pain, it was over,” she says.
The accessibility of the drug in her circles also fuelled Cyrus’ addiction problem.
“I was surrounded by people who were easily able to get it by buying it from people,” she says, recalling how it soon became a habit. “It just kind of becomes this dark pit, bottomless pit.”
Soon she was sleeping all day and waking up at 8 p.m., not knowing what day it was, and her memory became unreliable, reaching a peak as the pandemic began in 2020.
Cyrus remembers beginning passing out during an interview, which was never aired, to promote her album The End of Everything in May of that year.
“I was completely nodding off and falling asleep, and unable to keep my head up or keep my eyes open, because I was so far gone,” she says.
The wake-up call came later that summer, when her grandmother Loretta passed away, without her having a real chance to say goodbye.
“I felt so guilty for not being there when my grandma died. I was there physically, but emotionally, I was not there. I couldn’t be,” says, adding that she had also felt guilty shutting her grieving mother Tish out at the time. “That was my big eye-opener: I was sitting alone, and I was scared, and I realized that all the people that I love and all the people that I need, I was the one pushing them away.”
.@noahcyrus for Rolling Stone, shot by Jessica Lehrmanhttps://t.co/fe4hR5ETdk pic.twitter.com/IiZWsD0diU
— Rolling Stone (@RollingStone) July 5, 2022
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Talking about her recovery processes, Cyrus says, “I was being helped by everybody that I needed help from, and it took some time to get on my own two feet.”
Writing new music also helped her on her journey to overcoming the addiction.
“It was coming out in my lyrics,” she says. “So, it’s like, ‘I’m not going to hide my truth.’ I think it was evident that I was going through something the past couple years — I think my fans saw it. I think the public could see it.”
Cyrus adds, “I’m not trying to be, like, any spokesperson for recovery or anything like that. I, myself, am just going through it and figuring it out.”
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